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| NerdMonday, November 1st 2004. | |
Deaconanti-social commentary
Posts: 28,084 Join Date: Jul 2002 |
The root of all sorrow I can't handle the idea of someone being dead who I want alive. That's what I discovered is the key to all misery. Wanting things to be different than they are. Well, that's obvious, but I mean, indulging the mind with the ideas that they are different. Such as being in your first class of the day, or at work early. You have your initial sleepiness. But what makes it just painful is when you fantasize about your pillow and soft blankets, and then have to realize that you're in a cold building with no chance for sleep in hours to come. Having a crush is one thing, but it becomes agony when you go on imagining you and your angel together, cuddling and spending time together, loving on each other, and then having to realize that you're never going to be together. If you don't indulge in that, you're only left with the relatively nice feeling of affection for another person. When I recently lost my bag (which was stolen with a GBA SP, digital camera, and personal notebook inside) it sucked. But what really flared up my anger and sense of loss about it was giving in to the thoughts that maybe I'd just misplaced it, or that maybe it'd turn up, or dreaming that I'd somehow get it back. The loss itself was just loss. You can move on from that.And so it's not about someone dying that hurts so badly. People die. It's when you have dreams that you could go back into the past and save them, it's when you wish upon every lucky star you see that they'll come back into your life. If you spend so much time imagining that he never really died, and was still in your life, and the past was just some huge nightmare, that's the problem. Indulging in the kind of fantasy that puts stark contrast on the biting reality. That's the kind of thing that will drive you fucking insane. So my advice is that if you have a sense of loss, just let it go. No matter how much you want to escape reality into that warm inviting delusion, don't. You might as well shoot heroin rather than daydream about alternate realities that aren't going to happen. They're equally addicting and they're equally capable of completely fucking you up. |
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| NerdMonday, November 1st 2004. | |
DaisyHello!
Posts: 31,788 Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Nowhere |
Sometimes all people have are their daydreams. |
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| NerdMonday, November 1st 2004. | |
DawsonMr. Tambourine Man
Posts: 10,533 Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Australia |
Don't worry, Deacon. I'm not going anywhere. Anyway, I agree. Not having the lady you want is absolute agony. It's not as easy to let go was you paint it to be, though. ___________________ 
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| NerdMonday, November 1st 2004. | |
Deaconanti-social commentary
Posts: 28,084 Join Date: Jul 2002 |
If all you have is daydreams, it's because you're unwilling to let them die and move on. Daydreams are hostile to your life. If you want to change your reality, first you must be willing to face it and live in it without escaping like a child. If you live in denial, you'll be stuck fucking a corpse the rest of your life. Symbolically. |
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| NerdMonday, November 1st 2004. | |
Ragnar DanneskjöldFriend of the Friendless
Posts: 18,111 Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Houston |
True true,.............Thanks for reminding me you bastard.  ___________________ I believe that banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing armies. If the American people ever allow private banks to control the issue of their currency, first by inflation, then by deflation, the banks and corporations that will grow up around [the banks] will deprive the people of all property until their children wake-up homeless on the continent their fathers conquered. The issuing power should be taken from the banks and restored to the people, to whom it properly belongs. -Thomas Jefferson, |
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| NerdMonday, November 1st 2004. | |
Deaconanti-social commentary
Posts: 28,084 Join Date: Jul 2002 |
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| NerdMonday, November 1st 2004. | |
JoeyJoJoJrShabaduSt. Patricks Day! Soon!
Posts: 2,215 Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Redmond, Washington |
Interesting....I just recently wrote something incredibly similar to this on my Xanga site...how bizarre.  ___________________  |
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| NerdMonday, November 1st 2004. | |
ShivanNerd Posts: N/A Join Date: N/A |
Recently I made that thread about me being lame and wanting to get a girlfriend. Everyone kept telling me to just go up and say something. Like Deacon said, when you imagine being a couple you feel worse, because it feels as if you are pushing yourself farther away from reality and that you are desperately wanting it to just be reality. Well, today was a great day for me, I was in the library and I sat down next to the girl I had been wanting to talk to for the longest time and I brought up conversation. But the great part about it was that I could tell she was interested in speaking to me. I had forgotten to introduce myself by giving my name and she goes- "You know, we've been sitting in the same class for weeks and I don't even know your name?" And of course we exchanged names. So, it seems as if I have had a wonderful day, but that little advancement, taking that one step closer to making a dream a reality isn't good. Because now my thoughts have progressed further than they were before. I want to ask this girl out and I can't tell if she wants that. So I find myself evaluating her actions towards me when I was apart. Trying to determine if she really liked me. Overall making me feel worse. I'm stupid, I realize this. But the point is- It's a never-ending staircase, when you take a step up another step is added. You can never reach the top. ___________________ Credit Cards Canadian Credit Cards Best Credit Card Deals |
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| NerdMonday, November 1st 2004. | |
ChronoSomebody To Love
Posts: 6,104 Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Got no feelin, Got no Rhythm, |
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| NerdMonday, November 1st 2004. | |
Deaconanti-social commentary
Posts: 28,084 Join Date: Jul 2002 |
Yeah we don't need an afternoon special here. This is about the drug of fantasy, not some vague Hallmark topic on "not sweating the small stuff". Go to bed, Chrono. |
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| NerdMonday, November 1st 2004. | |
ChronoSomebody To Love
Posts: 6,104 Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Got no feelin, Got no Rhythm, |
uhh..............no ___________________  http://swagbucks.com/refer/migetmonkee91 Don't doubt this site, sign up with my link and read the instructions. It rules! |
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| NerdMonday, November 1st 2004. | |
ShivanNerd Posts: N/A Join Date: N/A |
I don't want everyone to misunderstand me, I said that actually being able to talk to this girl was a bad thing because it led to other thoughts that I know is a stretch. But it isn't bad whatsoever really. It's the best thing in the world to know I can now talk to her. And actually be her friend. Just to clear that up. ___________________ Credit Cards Canadian Credit Cards Best Credit Card Deals |
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| NerdMonday, November 1st 2004. | |
ModijoeHey
Posts: 5,296 Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: North York, Ontario |
I'm a kid so I'm still allowed to day dream ;p But I agree with Deacon,its just weird,something/one you feel you can't live without doesn't even exsist on this Earth anymore.I lost two best friends in the past 4 years and its been hell,I never really had a girlfriend (shutup I'm still kindda young >_>...or a hopeless loser)but my friend had a girl who died cause some weirdo kidnapped her and then killed her. And the sorrow that came from that... Just whoa... Its amazing how the most cheerful people can turn into such dull people. I have a feeling he also daydreamed cause he never really did pay attention in class <_< Which was sad because cause of his daydreams its worse,daydreams are horrible when it comes to stuff you wanna have but can't.Cause it doesn't make you feel better,it makes it worse,my friend still obsesses over his loss and its been a year >_< |
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